Taking off my casual clothes . . .

Sunday, my pastor preached about "Casual Christianity" meaning being morally indifferent, spiritually idle and lukewarm in faith. The Casual Christian has knowledge of God and believes in Him but is strongly tied to the world and afraid to let go - basically trying to serve two masters. Jesus instructs us in Matt 6.24 that this is not possible.

I remember trying to live out my Christian life without letting go of the world. I would show up at church and rush into the choir stand with the stenches of the club and some random guy clinging to my skin. I would teach a Sunday School lesson, maybe dip out of service early, and go smoke a blunt and lay up with my boyfriend. Eventually, my service in church was less and less because it was hard to wake up with a hangover and go to 9am service. It was rough trying to encourage someone with prayer when my mind was clouded with guilt. Listening to the pastor "step on my toes" every Sunday was more than my conscience could take. I knew I had to let one of my masters go. Unfortunately, it was easier to indulge in the world than sacrifice for God.

My problem was thinking that changing myself to live for God would make life too restrictive and boring. That trying to get rid of my vices, desires and indulgences was impossible and would never happen. Actually, I was right.

If I try to change myself, then yes, life will seem cut-off from all of the things I enjoy. I won't be able to have the fun that I'm used to having. And letting go of my vices, addictions, desires?? Impossible!! That is why God doesn't expect me to change myself. He doesn't ask me to clean up and then dedicate my life to Him. The only thing He asks of me is to love Him, with all of my heart, soul and strength (Deut. 6.5). Giving Him myself completely - in whatever state I am in - allows God to mold me and shape me (heart, soul and body) into what He needs me to be in order to serve Him best. ("The LORD your God will cleanse your heart . . . so that you will love him with all your heart and soul, and so you may live!" Deut. 30.6)

So now, my life isn't restricted and boring to me, because my mind has been changed and those things I used to desire to do, I don't desire anymore. Now, there are desires that remain, but my changed heart doesn't want to partake. Don't think that all desires or weaknesses will leave you. Just like there is no cure for addictions, there is no cure for sin. A drug addict must work daily against his addiction. In the same way, I have to work daily against the flesh. Becoming like God is a process that must grow and continue unto completion. God leaves us with certain struggles so that we will continue to lean on Him and seek Him daily - allowing the process to continue.

In Pastor's sermon, he discussed suffering for our faith. First Peter 4.1-5 tells us that we are to put on a mind of suffering as Jesus did. Verse 13 goes on to say we should be rejoicing over suffering because suffering is a spiritual refining process. It helps to wean us from a life of sin. Suffering also makes us stronger, e.g., "No Pain, No Gain." We have to go through the fire of suffering to come out changed. This is all apart of the process of becoming like God.

Now, to the unbeliever (and maybe some believers) this is not appealing. Why should I leave a life of doing what I want to enter a life of pain, discomfort and suffering? What I've realized is, life outside of God is full of pain, discomfort and suffering, as well. The difference is having God to ease the pain, take away the discomfort and heal the suffering. When I suffer for God, I am rewarded in a way that is unlike the rewards of the flesh. When I suffer for my faith, I don't have to turn to addictive drugs or destructive lifestyles to numb the pain or alleviate discomfort. God has promised never to put more on us than we can bear, because He makes everything bearable!

God has allowed Satan to be god of this world - for the time being - so he has some power over those who are not empowered by God. Thus, the choice is essentially whether to serve God or Satan. The more I understood this, the more I realized that I had to make a choice. I decided that if I kept living for Satan I would end up dead and possibly by my own hands (there were many close calls). That life was fun, but the fun came at a cost: my sanity, my joy, my peace. So, I made up my mind to give my life to God and "introduced my Sunday self to my Monday self." I took off the my Casual Christian uniform that I'd worn to fool the world and put on the true Armor of God that is my gift from Him. My mind is clear, joy has been restored and I live with abundant peace. The changes come one-by-one, slowly buy surely. But as long as I wake up and choose Christ, the change will continue.